Setting The Table...

I just returned home from dinner at the end of what seems like a marathon Anniversary Weekend. Yesterday, we celebrated our 40th Wedding Anniversary with a very small group of our most intimate friends. It was a very special luncheon made even more special by our kids who put the whole thing together.

One of oldest and closest friends taught me that "Friends are the family you get to choose..." and this was a very special "family" occasion.

This evening, we had dinner with our kids and our daughters "young man." In a toast, my wife put it together better than I ever could... Here's what she said... "Yesterday afternoon we had lunch with the friends who have become our family... And, this evening we get to have dinner with our family - who have become friends!" Wow!

But, believe it or not, that isn't what I'm writing about.

I'm writing about this evening's dinner experience which was incredible in every respect. It was made even more special... at least, for me, because I am in the middle of Danny Meyer's, Setting The Table - a book about restaurants and what he likes to call, "gracious hospitality."

If you don't know who Danny Meyer is I'll do my best to help you understand. But, let's just say it would be worth a trip to New York and an evening or afternoon spent dining at one of his many restaurants to truly understand. I had the privilege of experiencing "gracious hospitality" at two of his restaurants and believe me, it's an experience you want to repeat!

It's really all about picking the right people: people who want to shine... people who want to create great art in the kitchen and deliver the gift of great service at the table.

We had a Danny Meyer experience in Westlake this evening at Tuscany. We had some of the best food we've had outside Manhattan and the best service we've ever had anywhere. It wasn't inexpensive - But, I didn't expect it to be inexpensive. However, it didn't leave you questioning the value of what was received either. Our server shared the menu with artful enthusiasm and actually persuaded my son NOT to have something on the menu because as he put it, "It's the worst thing on the menu!" The young man who helped my son select the wine was equally as honest and enthusiastic... They knew their products and they understood their clientele. The service was attentive without being overbearing. In other words, it was elegant!

What else can you say about a dinner at a restaurant like this other than that it was expensive... and, worth every penny! All you can say is that it helped make a special event even more special.

We have a service business that you would think has virtually nothing to do with serving fine food. We service and maintain automobiles and trucks. And, yet, there is a lot to be learned from a Danny Meyer experience regardless of where you experience it. There was a great deal of energy and effort apparent in the training invested in the staff. There was enthusiasm, pride and excitement. There was a definite desire to ensure a powerful and positive experience. And, it was obvious the goal was to have you return as soon as possible, and to have you share a great experience with your friends, family members and colleagues.

All I can say is that it worked! And, that I'll take this experience back to the shop with me and try to help our people understand the importance of understanding, practicing and delivering "gracious hospitality" in every interaction we have with our customers, clients and friends with the same powerful goals in mind...

Life Is What Happens...

Do you know what happens when you've had a difficult week, you're up later than would be considered prudent, you're really tired; and, angry just in general - you hit the wrong combination of keys on the keyboard and the five or six hundred "perfect" words you've just written disappear just as the software decides to "SAVE NOW!" 


Do you know what's even worse? How about trying to reconstruct or, better yet, remember; what you've just written! Bet you can't do it... I know I couldn't: not last night, not this morning, not this afternoon.


Now, we're another day deeper into the first month of the second decade of the 21st Century and I still can't remember. Although, I'm sure it had something to do with doing too many things at the same time, being up later than would or should be considered prudent, being really tired... Especially, when there is a full moon to contend with! 


Essentially, that's the problem. I start each day with a list of things to do - if you asked my wife, she would tell you that my problems begin with that list, because it is unreasonably ambitious. I go over the list in my head trying to ensure it is, in fact, reasonable: reasonable, as in possible. I write everything down. And, then I head for work with every intention of working my way through the list: every intention of following the plan. But, I never do... 


It's not that I don't try. I try very damned hard most of the time; sometimes when I don't really feel like trying. And, there are days I get closer to successfully working my way through that list than others. But, to tell you the truth I'm not sure I've ever actually gotten through a whole one. At least, it's been long enough so I can't remember finishing if I did. 


Someone with the brains G-d gave a duck would think about building a shorter list: a list not quite so ambitious. But, I guess I don't qualify. The best part of the whole story is the fact I've actually managed to 'shed' a number of responsibilities and was actually looking forward to living with fewer "To Do's." But, 'stuff' keeps bubbling up through the floor until my socks get wet and I find myself adding more stuff to an already impossible list.


When things begin to fall apart, as they often do I can hear my Grandmother laughing in the background. Her favorite saying, although it loses something in translation, was: "Man plans, and G-d laughs..."


John Lennon said it another way in "Baby Boy:" "Life is what happens when you're making other plans..." I think he should have said, "making ANY plans!" 


I'm starting to think it's just plain futile.


Oh, and before you suggest it's just a matter of organization - I'm not sure it is. In fact, I have a row of books on time management - although, I've never understood why they call it that. You can't manage time... It won't cooperate. All you can hope to do is manage yourself - in time. Consequently, it should be called "Personal Management." In any case, I've got a library full of books on the subject filled with systems and suggestions galore. I know how to prioritize. I know how to attack the most difficult tasks first. I get it! The problem is dealing with other people whose priorities, wants, needs and expectations differ from my own. Throw in a service business: a retail service business, and you know that my plans are subject to change at any moment based upon someone else's needs or wants.


When you own and operate an automotive service business someone else's crisis does justify an emergency in your world!


So, I wake up, plan the day, make my lists and try to force the day to comply... at least, a little. 


I make my plans and life happens. I make my plans... and, G-d laughs.


Let's see, what was it I had to get done tomorrow morning...

An Un-Happy, Happy Ending...

I'm not going to make the pool tomorrow morning and I'm bummed... Yep! Words I thought I'd never hear, let alone utter. But, it's the truth. I got a call from the accountant at a consulting/coaching company I work with and the only time we can 'meet:' he's in Maryland, is tomorrow morning at just about the time I would be climbing out of the pool... And, that stinks!

Not as much as the Tiger Balm... But, it still stinks!

Now, I've got to figure out how I'm going to get that time in the water back or what I can substitute that will make me feel as good when I'm done. I could go to Krav tomorrow night. That would certainly be a test of the shoulder/elbow issues I've been dealing with. But, I'm not sure I want to know how that particular test will be graded. And, besides, the last time I was in this kind of pain I worked too hard, injured myself too deeply and stayed away far too long.

The way things look right now, it's going to probably move in the direction of acupuncture and a good, deep tissue massage - great place in Simi for both, by the way.

It will almost certainly guarantee a 'happy ending.' But, it's just as certain it won't be the kind of 'happy ending' you're probably thinking of right now!

Now, it's a shower, a couple of pain relievers, a few hours sleep; only to wake up in order to drown myself in numbers instead of water...

Tiger Balmy...

Well, if you've been following this series of posts you know I've been struggling with my swimming and a reinforced, reinvigorated commitment to 'wellness'... not necessarily in that order. Despite the desire to do more or better, I've been dealing with a body that seems more interested in going home or to bed than in going to the next level.

I haven't let that or the aches and pains slow me down or stop me... At least, not yet. Instead, I dragged myself out of bed in what felt like the middle of the night to be in the water and ready to swim at 6:00 A.M. If the number of headlights and tail lights on the road at that hour are any indication of the number of people up and about, I can tell you with absolute certainty there aren't many people up and about at that hour!

Nevertheless, I was... And, I was in the water warming up before Jessica - the Master Class coach - arrived on the scene.

Again, that sounds easier than it was. As certain as I am that there were few others up and about, at or before 6:00 A.M., who were not coming home or heading to a workplace somewhere: I am equally as certain, the one place in the world your body does NOT want to be is submerged! I am also pretty sure the reason fish don't hate swimming as much as I do is because they don't have shoulders or elbows, hips or knees! Shoulders, hips, knees and elbows can and often do get sore...

Does anyone out there actually know if fish can get sore? It would be reassuring as hell to know!

I did six or eight laps of various different strokes before Jessica realized there was someone in the water she didn't know and a lot more after she did. I learned a lot for a first class. I learned that I have a 'natural' breast stroke (It was news to me too...). I learned that you can - with an emphasis on 'you' so far - swim while practicing "bi-lateral" breathing: you can alternate breathes from one side of your body to the other, which actually seemed to work better for me than breathing only on one side. I also learned you don't have to breathe once every three or four strokes: but, that you still have to breathe! I learned that I have no endurance, at least not yet. Which was disappointing. And, that I still get winded much too easily... Even more disappointing.

Did mention that I've only been in the water eight or ten times and that I'm terribly impatient; or, have you already figured that out.

The good news was finishing more laps and more different strokes than I have ever - emphasis on: ever - completed in my life and I didn't drown, as evidenced by my typing this message some twelve hours later!

I should be back in the water Wednesday morning... Maybe, even tomorrow morning depending upon when I get done tonight and how my right elbow and shoulder are feeling. If I don't go to the "Y" to swim tomorrow morning I'll probably return to Krav (Krav Maga) tomorrow night. My thinking is, as long as my shoulder and elbow hurt anyway; why not.

Oh... And, if you read the last post: applying Tiger Balm before you get into bed at night is something you really shouldn't do unless you're sleeping alone. If you aren't sleeping alone, it isn't something you ought to do without first asking your significant other if that would be OK. If you don't heed my advice, it is almost certain you will be back in the water again, a lot sooner than you thought you would... Not at the "Y" and in the pool, but back in your bathroom and in the shower!

If you're lucky, any remnant of the "Eau de Tiger Balm" will find its way down the drain. And, you may find your way off the couch!

Everyone Back In The Pool

I went back to the pool again late Saturday afternoon. It was wonderful!

Well, almost wonderful... I went to swim, and the pool was wonderful. In fact, with the exception of a few little ones and their respective parents, I had an Olympic-size pool just about all to myself.

The part that wasn't so wonderful was the 'getting older' part of working out. It's that; "Eighteen-Year-Old Brain: Sixty-Three Year-Old Body" stuff again.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I haven't been to the gym in a while and when I was going I wasn't swimming.

How long is "a while?" Let's just leave it at "a while," and move on. You can fill in the blank if necessary. However long it's been, it's been too long and now I'm doing something I've never done before and my body is crying, "Foul!" as a result.

So, tomorrow morning I'll be at the "Y" before it opens to take a class. What kind of a class? A swimming class so I can move from something that must look almost like drowning, to something that looks almost like swimming. I've decided I have to become more comfortable in the water... which is hard to do when the water is one of those places you are the most uncomfortable. I'm going because Saturday's sojourn at the pool was a definite improvement over my previous attempts at drowning. And, it was an improvement because I stopped trying to muscle my way through the swimming and slowed everything down to a "crawl," if you'll pardon the pun.

I focused on the obvious skills: floating, breathing, relaxing in a foreign environment and just moving through the water. Instead of trying to cover as much distance as quickly as I could, I keep things under control and focused on 'smooth' instead: no thrashing, no splashing, no gasping and no trying to breathe water! And, to tell you the truth, it actually worked... a little. I didn't run out of air as often. I didn't get as tired. My heart didn't try to explode out of my chest, and as a result I felt a hell of a lot better when it was time to get out of the pool.

Why swimming, if it's so uncomfortable; so unnatural?

Because...

Because it is uncomfortable and unnatural; at least it is to me. I'm doing it because I don't want to do it. And, because I know the results will be more than worth the effort if I prevail. If I can manage to stay with it, my endurance and stamina will increase as well as my overall fitness. I know this to be true because I can see the difference it's made in my son's Tri training and the training he is doing for the Iron Man he's enrolled to participate in.

All I have to do is work my way through the injuries, the pain and the discomfort. That takes a lot of positive self-talk and the encouragement of friends and family: and, a healthy sense of humor. I'm working on the self-talk and my son is both a great example and a wonderful cheerleader. The sense of humor part seems to be taking care of itself and we'll have to wait and see how or if the rest of the family signs on.

In the meantime, I've got to get ready for tomorrow morning and that means a hot shower, ice on my elbow and shoulder, followed by a little Tiger Balm on both.

I'm not exactly sure how the Tiger Balm rub down is going to go, however. It may turn out to be part of the sense of humor and the being able to laugh at yourself you really need to get through something like this, especially after a long absence.

I was applying some Tiger Balm in the locker room after my shower and before I got dressed on Saturday when one of those 'little ones' I referred to a minute ago, turned in my direction and said, "Yuch! What is that, and why does it smell so bad? That stuff is really strong! "

I told him it was Tiger Balm... And, that I was using it because I was sore.

Do you know what happened next? He looked at his Dad, and then at me, and said, "Mister, I been to the Zoo and I seen the Tigers... And, know what! None of 'em smelled anything like that!"

I'm going to shut down, take a shower and apply some Tiger Balm to my elbow and shoulder before I go to bed... and, and wait to hear what my wife has to say about the stuff. I'm not sure, but I'll bet it won't be as funny!

As Good As It Gets

I’m not sure if there has ever been an industry more poised or ready for great change than the automotive aftermarket as it currently exists. While a great deal of technology has found its way into the everyday operations of most of the business concerns operating within the aftermarket you would be hard pressed to call any of them ‘innovative.’ The model is, if nothing else, traditional in both its construction; and, ultimately, its execution.

Business is being done largely as business has always been done for the last hundred years.

Certainly, there have been changes. Instead of looking up parts applications in a physical catalogue and then writing an order by hand… Or, accepting a motorist’s vehicle for service; writing and entering customer information on the work order by hand; looking up both labor and parts in physical books, guides, manuals and catalogues; and, then finishing the process manually: you can accomplish virtually every operational step online and by computer. But, exactly what has changed?

We are doing the same kinds of things the same kinds of ways… Perhaps, a little faster: Perhaps, more accurately: Perhaps, more clearly: Perhaps, accompanied by easier lookup, documentation and retrieval: Perhaps, with the aid of digital image here and there.

But, exactly what has changed?

There is no argument: the computer has made all of our lives easier... and, faster. But, many of the same tasks are still being accomplished much the same way as they have always been accomplished.

The question isn’t whether or not automation is a major contributor to gains in productivity. It is.

The question is, or at least should be: Is what we are doing, or the way we are doing it the most effective, most efficient way to serve the needs of our customers? Or, perhaps, more to the point: Is there another way, a better way, a different approach altogether?

After forty-four years in the business, all these enhancements look like variations on a central theme to me. These variations can be beautiful, but I can’t help but think it may be time for a new ‘musical score,’ a new piece of music altogether.

The problem as I see it is one of imagination. We can’t conceive of something new and different while continuing to embrace what is old, comfortable and familiar. Most of all, it may not be reasonable to ask the industry to reinvent itself while still invested in the current paradigm. Ultimately, both the answer and the pressure to change must to come from the motoring public. It must come from the person burdened with the care and custody of the vehicle because that’s whose wants, needs and expectations we must exceed in order to achieve any measure of success: it will have to be aligned and consistent with the vehicle owner’s life and life style choices.

We (the industry) keep offering you (the motoring public) service options that we choose based upon what we think you may want or need from us.

We keep asking ourselves: Will this work? Is it acceptable? Is it adequate? When the question should really be: What is optimum?

So, I present you with that question: What is optimum? What is it you want, need or expect from us? How would you like those products and services delivered?  

If you are a vehicle owner; a member of the motoring public: What do you like about the current model? And, what would you change if you could?

If you are reading this and you are a member of the manufacturing or distribution communities, I’d like to ask you the very same questions. And, if you are a member of the service industry, what do you think about all this? Are things ‘good’ just the way they are? Is this as good as it gets? Or, could things be better?

Better for you… Better for me… Better for your clients.

Complacency...

There are few things in the world that get me crazier than average. Average drives me nuts!

No one I know strives to be average, at least no one I actually want to know or continue to have a relationship with.

Striving to be average is all about giving up, coasting, taking the easy way out, accepting 'good enough' as good enough. It's about complacency... accepting things as they are because doing nothing is less complicated and takes far less energy than doing anything.

I'm not talking about someone who is trying the best they can but can't prevail because of circumstance, limited opportunity or limited ability. I'm not talking about the people who can't do any better or try any harder... By definition, they are trying as hard as they can to be the best they can be; to do the best they are capable of doing.

I'm talking about the people who could make a difference, who could do better: but, after careful consideration, choose not to. Generally, at the risk of putting themselves or someone close to them in danger of some sort. They would rather work at 'getting by,' than work at getting better. And, I think what bothers me most of all about this social or cultural phenomenon is that it seems to be growing.

People come by the shop to take an order or solicit our business either representing themselves or other companies and they just barely manage to follow the script as if showing up was enough. They don't bring anything of value to the relationship, they don't create anything of consequence, they don't move information up or down the pipeline. Hell, sometimes they don't even say Hello!

I can't live like that. I don't think I would even if I could: could, as in allowed. I'm not wired that way and neither are any of the people I work with. They are constantly trying to learn more, get better, accomplish something significant, overcome obstacles, attain success. Now, they may choose to define success a little differently than the majority might define it. Their success isn't always about 'stuff' or money. More often than not, it's about that feeling of satisfaction that can only come from doing something extraordinary. And, extraordinary rarely occurs without a serious compliment of exertion.

I think the answer is not only simple, it's obvious. This level of performance - Or, perhaps, more appropriately - this level of non-performance, should no longer be accepted as adequate by anyone anywhere anymore. Complacency should be banished, and its practicioners and advocates no longer tolerated or accepted.

I think I'm going to give it a try... And, the sign at the driveway will read: Average No Longer Tolerated Here!

It Sounds Easier Than It Was...

It's been an interesting weekend following an even more interesting week.

I guess in a way all my weeks and weekends are like that.

At work, we managed to 'clear the lot' after a busy week yet again. That's our term for completing... and, delivering, all the work in the shop. No one would be walking or struggling to make alternative arrangements for transportation because we were unable to meet or exceed wants, needs or expectations: that's a pretty big deal in my world.

Big enough for me to follow that statement with an: "It sounds easier than it is!"

The week itself included interviewing prospective job applicants; beating my way through a marketing campaign, that like bread dough with too much yeast - kept oozing out of the pan; and, just about losing it with an outside sales representative who has been serving our account for more than twenty years and through two different suppliers.

It also included the completion of two difficult... No, let me re-phrase that: Impossible! diagnostic problems that we were finally able to put to bed. The sense of accomplishment... and, relief is more than words alone can describe! And, I started working out again... in the pool, at the local "Y."

That's a really big deal, especially for me. It's that Newton/Inertia thing: A body at rest tends to stay at rest! Yadda, yadda, yadda...

I didn't make it back to the studio that night as I had planned. But, I hadn't planned to knot up a muscle in my calf either. The studio (Krav Maga) will have to wait for this coming Tuesday morning or evening. I did, however, make it back to the pool at the "Y" for some laps with my son Saturday afternoon after going to the shop, filling up the car, getting a hair cut, having brunch with my daughter and visiting my Mom at the Jewish Home for the Aging, where she currently resides.

There is something very special about doing things like that with your child or children, especially if it includes visiting a parent or parents: something profoundly inter-generational. So, if there are any fathers (Or, mothers....) out there reading this with adolescent, or even adult children; I highly recommend doing something - anything - with your kids. It's time well spent and something really special!

Ryan and I trained in Chinese Kenpo and tested for our Brown Belts together...That too, sounds easier than it was!  But, it was an incredible experience that would be hard to duplicate and harder to explain.

Currently, Ryan is training for an Iron Man in Arizona this coming November. His drive, discipline and determination are inspiring and motivated me to get off my butt. That would have probably been enough, in and of itself. But, having him guide me in the pool yesterday with form and fitness pointers was especially 'sweet.' It builds a kind of closeness I've rarely seen shared by other parents and children I've watched over the years and would be one of those things the MasterCard commercials would suggest are: Priceless.

I started today with a trip to the shop and normal weekend regimen of paperwork that I finished just before beginning this entry: four hours of payroll, metrics, documentation and planning. In between starting and finishing, we had lunch and went to the Annenberg photography exhibit in Century City with some close friends - very cool place, very cool exhibit of sports photography. I highly recommend it!

Oh, and did I mention the book I just started reading that I am now more than half way through? If I didn't, brace yourself! I'm going to be talking about it a lot over the next few weeks! The book is thoughtful, provocative and full of insights into both our culture and current economic situation. More than that, it offers a way to overcome it all.

I think there are times when it's all about cramming five quarts of whatever substance you would like to visualize into a four quart container! Impossible? I don't think so. And, if you don't believe it can be done, call me... Or, better yet, come down and I'll show you how it's done!

Now, it's off to bed so I can get up an hour earlier than I normally would to be at the "Y" when it opens. I didn't manage to drown myself last Tuesday and did lots better on Saturday thanks to my son's coaching. The water is calling me and like Ryan, my goal is to do just a little bit better with everything I do every time I do it! You can't do that without showing up!

TPMS

I just got off the phone following a twenty minute interview conducted by a Vice President at one of the nation's (The "world's," actually...) largest and most respected public relations companies. The interview was focused on our experience with TMPS - I know, it sounds like the interview was all about really 'cranky' tires. But, it was really about what you know about these highly sophisticated Tire Pressure Monitoring Systems and how what you know impacts what we do in the field: "We" being the repair community.

To tell you the truth, while interesting from a philosophical or theoretical point of view, or on the basis of the marketing program it will ultimately generate - there was nothing all that extraordinary about the interview with one small exception, and that exception was a sliver of insight I was able to garner, a glimpse of what success in our relationship should really be all about... from your perspective: the only perspective that matters.

If my experience has taught me nothing else, it has taught me that the only way you can make anything automotive 'relevant' to a vehicle owner is to demonstrate that it is 'meaningful.' The interview I just completed helped me clarify that; perhaps, even quantify it more than anything I've ever done: especially, when it comes to anything even remotely 'technical.'

It's really all a matter of three questions, maybe four. The first question should be the most obvious: What does 'it,' whatever 'it' might be, mean? And, that should translate to: What does it mean... to me! How will it impact me: economically, from the standpoint of safety, as a matter of inconvenience, et al.

If this is relating to a warning lamp, noise or a potential  mechanical problem, the second question is or should be: How will I know? That question is really all about how to tell if there is something going wrong before it actually fails and really goes wrong.

The third question is really a two part question: What do I do about 'it:' whatever 'it' might be? And/or, what do I do to avoid 'it' altogether.

The fourth questionis, if there really is a fourth question, is: How will all or any of this impact me (meaning you)?

I'll be exploring these and other questions over the next month or so if for no other reason than to help me find better, more appropriate, more meaningful, more relevant ways to help you.

If you have any questions or comments, please don't hesitate to let me know. Like the computer in your car or truck, this will work better if the communication is bi-directional. But, we can talk about that later!

Have A Good Day!

How many times a day do you do you catch yourself directing someone you know or perhaps even a few people you don't, to "Have a good day!"

It's become a reflex, hasn't it... A smile. A wave. And, a friendly, thoughtless edict.

Meaningless.

What does it mean when something becomes meaningless, especially if it is a 'something' you yourself  are guilty of doing countless times a day! I know I just said it a few hours ago when the last person to pick up a vehicle before we closed paid their bill and started toward the door: "Thank You. Have a good day!"

Absurd!

No matter how you determine what a 'normal' day is, at 6:15 in the evening that day is just about over. There certainly isn't a lot of time left for something 'good' to happen. So, why bother suggesting it?

I could understand wishing someone a "good day" if we could all agree on what a good day looked or felt like. But, that hasn't happened... Has it? If it has, I must have missed it and I don't think I did. And, if that's the case, now might be a good time for us to give it a shot. What have we got to lose? Directing someone to have a great day would certainly be a lot more meaningful if everyone could agree on what it really meant to have one.

My son called this morning after he ran in the rain for an hour-and-a-half, and with his best John Wayne, declared that "A day without training is like a day without sunshine, Pilgrim!" 

Does that mean a day with training is a "good day," or at least the start of one? I'll bet it does.

If you are in business, is a good day a profitable day: a day where you have somehow managed to make a little more than you spent? It certainly would be "good day" in this economy! Is it enough to define a "good day" simply as one that hasn't managed to become a bad one? What do you think? I've experienced more than my share of days like that: days where just having nothing bad happen looked and felt pretty damned good by the end of the day! But, is that really enough?

I'll bet most of us have had enough bad days to recognize a good one if we came across one. It would probably have a lot more to do with content than with meaningless activity. It would be filled with more laughter than tears, more satisfaction than frustration. I'm sure there would be a sense of service thrown in for good measure. There would be at least a little appreciation, some recognition and maybe even the sense you actually managed to accomplish something that day floating around as well.

Maybe, that's what we're really trying to say. And, if it is, then we should just say what we mean...

Thank you! And, have a meaningful day! Thank you! And, have a rewarding day! Have a day filled with satisfaction and accomplishment, a day filled with love and respect! Have a day filled with people who make you laugh and smile, people you are genuinely glad to see and be around!

Now, that would be a "great day," wouldn't it! And, if you think about it, I'll bet it was!

Drowning In Your Sorrows...

If you ever want to know just how out of shape you are just head for the pool. I don't mean one of those rinky-dink pools in a backyard somewhere. I'm talking about a serious pool. One of those fifteen or twenty-five-yarders! Then, dement yourself into believing you can actually do laps: as in more than one.

If you really want to torment yourself, meet one of your clients there... someone you've known for decades, someone who can swim laps until you get tired of watching, and then get in the water with him! Oh, and then break your glasses just to add insult to injury.

That's what I did this morning and despite the fact that I am sore: my body, and bruised: my ego, I'll probably do it again tomorrow morning because I'm certain there can be only one of two possible outcomes. Either I will drown and have nothing to worry about. Or, I will eventually build up enough stamina (and, wind) to get better. Now, before I go any further, I don't have any illusions about what 'better' means. To me, it means just a hair better than today. No unrealistic expectations here, just a profound respect for my son who managed to swim intervals for twenty-five hundred yards the other day.

I'll do it because I really liked the way I felt after I got out of the pool. Particularly, the fact that no one had to pull me off the bottom. Although, my body was sore and my lungs were burning - I felt pretty good: good because the endorphins were lying to my central nervous system and good because I actually dragged myself out of bed at 0:Dark:30 in the morning and was at the "Y" at 5:50 A.M., ten minutes before they opened. Now, all I've got to do is create a string of mornings like this.

My attitude is simple... If the kid can do it: I can do it. And, if it isn't this it will be something else. In fact, I think I'll go home and change and head for Krav tonight just to see if I can survive that... again!

Life Cycling...

I know I've mentioned that my son is a triathelete currently training for an ironman. A lot of that training is cycling related and much of that training has to do with spin classes.

I've been working out for years, but sadly I have to admit I've never taken a spin class. I probably will at some point as my son has just about convinced me it is essential if I ever get serious about straddling a bicycle again.

I just got home from visiting our local hospital. I was visiting a friend of my Mom's who is in the Intensive Care Unit. I could tell you just how special this lady is: how strong, how good, how grounded... I could tell you how good she was to my mother, or how nice it was to have her here for the holidays for the few years they lived in the same retirement community, but I'm not sure that is central to what I need to share here.

You see she is in "transition," the current medical euphemism for "checking out," heading to that "Big Garage in the Sky," or just plain dieing.

This lady was diagnosed with stomach cancer a little over a year ago and at eighty-nine decided against conventional treatment. Her rationale was simple: quality over quantity. For the most part, it was a great choice. Health-wise, the last year was a good one overall. Now, however, the consequences of that decision had become clear. The family decided to honor her wishes and withhold "heroic measures."

We're all going to check out eventually. That's about the only thing we can be sure of. How we do it, however, is a choice we can make if we take the initiative have the courage to follow through. After leaving the hospital, it occurred to me that we should probably train for this just as much and just as hard as we would if we were running a marathon or preparing for an ironman. From where I'm sitting, it like takes at least the same courage, discipline and determination.

So, maybe there ought to be a "Life-Cycling Class" just like there is a "Spin-Cycling Class:" something to prepare your mind, your body and your spirit for perhaps the most difficult test of all. It wouldn't necessarily have to focused on just the 'bad' stuff either. It could help us train for births and confirmations, Communions and Bar Mitzvahs, weddings and even divorces, if necessary. And, it could certainly help us prepare for the hollow, empty, difficult moments when we realize that either we or someone we care deeply about is moving to the next level.

I think my mother's friend took such a class... She confided to a mutual friend that her mother had told her that if you lived a good life you would probably have a good death.

Maybe we should all start training now...

Re-dedication, But To What...

I just got moving and I'm already tired...

Not from anything I've done; the most exhausting thing I've done this morning is eat some oatmeal, fire up the computer... and, then read my son's blog (theironmadman.blogspot.com). Just following his regimen on the blog as a voyeur is enough to wipe anyone out.

Although we talk about it a lot, I'm still not sure how he's doing it. I just know he is, and I am in awe... And, a little embarrassed. I haven't worked out in months: a combination of the demands of owning your own business, industry responsibilities associated with the writing I do and the normal kinds of family "stuff" most of us have had to deal with from time to time.

It's easy not to do something. The universe and all the laws of physics are calling at you to remain at rest and depending upon how creative you are, excuses abound almost everywhere! Ask me, I'm an expert (When I want or need to be!).

Not working out and then getting angry, frustrated, upset, guilt-ridden or agitated about it is at the very least counter-productive. It accomplishes nothing. In fact, all it really does is drive you deeper  the  kind of unpleasant blue funk most of us are all too familiar with. Nevertheless, it's something I think most of us have been guilty of at some point in our lives. Right now, I keep trying to figure out why I'm not more motivated than I am.

It's not like I hate working out. Depending upon the nature of the working out, I'm one of those people who actually enjoys it.

Don't get me wrong, I hate getting up early and going to the gym! I don't generally turn in until my wife has had a chance to to spend a little time with Fritz Coleman, the late night, Channel 4 weather-guy, in Los Angeles. So, five-thirty comes along 'mighty quick.' And, working out after work - which feels too much like working out too often, is even more difficult. But, once I'm there doing whatever it is I'm doing for me, I really enjoy it. That's why it bothers me  that I'm having so much trouble making it happen. The only thing I can think of is the absence of community.

I know, right about now you're going, "What? What the hell is he talking about?" But, think about it for a minute. Don't you find that most of the things you really enjoy doing, especially those things that involve significant effort: physical, mental or emotional, involve a core group of people you really enjoy being with? A community of sorts... Don't you feel a sense of responsibility to these other folks that helps drive you? And, don't a lot of them seem to feel the same way about you?

Every time I've been involved in something where there has been this sense of community: someone to call just to make sure everything was OK when you didn't show up that morning, someone to push you farther than you knew you were capable of going, someone to convince you that you could do something (like my son's ironman preparation) everyone else was sure was impossible, you made the commitment and got it done.

I had that level of commitment... and, community, all the years I made it to the gym before five-thirty in the morning and started my day pushing more weight around than I ever thought I could. I had it at every martial arts studio I've ever attended, when the people and the program were "right." And, I guess I am desperately searching for it right now. Which, I'm sorry to say, demands that I stop writing, get dressed and get moving. Because, the one thing I am sure of is that I'm not going to find what I'm looking for here!

T'was the night before Christmas... Or, was that the night before New Year's?

I feel as if I've been unfaithful... hanging out someplace else with someone else when I should have been here all along.

I have an excuse, though! Lots of them, actually. There are always excuses!

Last week was the week of New Year's Eve: the week before New Year's Eve, and it was a tough week. It always is. I was on deadline for the publishing company I write for...

Have I mentioned that I write before? Well, I do... In addition to my responsibilities running our automotive service business - I'm a professional automotive repair technician and that's where the "Captain CarFix" comes from: an old CB Radio Handle, I am also a Senior Contributing Editor for Babcox Publications: the leading publisher in the automotive service aftermarket. Being "on" deadline is all about the eighteen hundred words I must stitch together for one publication and the five (never just five...) hundred to eight hundred words I have to put together for another every month.

It's a lot to do and the magazines come first.

There was a lot to do at the shop as well. The holidays are no holiday for us! Not in the automotive service business. All most people care about is our having their vehicle ready when promised, which can loosely be translated as before we close for the holiday. That would be OK if everyone understood the role they must play if that is to happen successfully.

Unfortunately, everyone - translate as: motorists - waits until the last possible moment to bring their vehicles in and then can't understand why or how that might be contributing to the system breaking down. Our goal has always been to "clear the lot" at week's end. We don't want anyone walking or without transportation if we can avoid it, and avoiding it generally results in a Herculean effort toward the end of the week.

Holiday weeks are almost always short weeks: think stuffing five quarts of anything in a four quart container!

Two holiday weeks back to back are brutal: mind numbing! And, that's why I've been elsewhere doing other things... or, more appropriately, doing no-things!

I'd love to say I'm back, fully recovered; but, I'm not! The fact that I am back at all will just have to be enough. In the meantime, I'll be thinking about you. Hope you'll be doing the same.